Practical Support

All adults in separated families may at some point need:

  • Information on benefits, money and debt management. This includes the usual range, with the addition of child support and divorce settlement issues where applicable (Remember to encourage clients to keep money issues separate from contact)
  • Help in finding affordable child-friendly accommodation. Supporting letters to housing providers detailing special circumstances and needs can be useful. This is needed for staying contact, not just residence.
  • Legal information. Pass on basic information about family law, for example on deliberating on contact, seeking it and enforcing it. Refer on to specialist help where needed.
  • Mediation. An impartial family mediator can help to create a dialogue between separated couples in order to make parenting arrangements.
  • Equipment, toys, games, books etc. Bear in mind that non-resident parents with staying contact need a full set of everything too. Second hand shops, libraries, toy libraries and play resource centres provide good saving opportunities. There may be an NCT sale or similar in your area. Parents can ask friends or relatives with older children if they have any equipment, clothes, toys or books that aren’t needed now. Co-operating separated parents can help children to bring favourite toys and clothes with them to aid continuity and identity – this requires trust.

Young Parents may need the above, plus:

  • Help in securing specialist young parent accommodation (often when family relationships have broken down). This is usually for young mothers. Policies on the inclusion of fathers will vary, on non-resident fathers more so, but include information on involved fathers in referrals. Temporary accommodation for young men is currently unlikely to be child-friendly, but when ready to sustain a tenancy, resident and non-resident young fathers also need child-friendly accommodation.
  • Help with sustaining tenancies. Young people often need extra support in running a household. It can be counter-productive for young parents to have tenancies before they are ready, as unpaid rent and debts can have ongoing repercussions. What solution will provide the most long-term stability for the child? Can you help rebuild bridges with the grandparents of the mother and father?
  • Signposting to parenting courses (if actually needed.)

Resident parents may also need:

  • Respite care if they have complex needs, though this should only be provided by agencies and services if the non-resident parent is not in a position to provide it, or is not capable of caring safely for children
  • Information on benefits that are paid to the parent who spends most time with the child e.g. working tax credit, child tax credit,
  • Help with child support issues (but encourage resident parents to keep money and parenting/contact issues separate) 

Non-Resident Parents

May also need practical help with contact on a budget:

The costs of exercising contact can be high, particularly travelling some distance to exercise staying contact. This can be prohibitive, involving travel, accommodation and meals out over and above ordinary parenting costs. This can prevent non-resident fathers and mothers on a low income from seeing their children.

Here are some ways of reducing the cost of distant contact to pass on:

  • Travel. Coaches are usually cheaper than trains. Buying tickets in advance, and to travel off-peak is cheaper. If the resident parent is flexible contact can be arranged around cheap tickets – for example avoiding expensive dates and times of day for handovers.
  • Accommodation. Youth hostels (country and city) are cheaper than bed and breakfasts, & you can cook to save money. Camping is cheapest of all and children often love it. Equipment can sometimes be hired from community resource centres. Families Need Fathers local groups sometimes offer bed and breakfast to parents and children - contact the branch in the area you will be visiting to find out if anything is available.
  • Meals. All youth hostels have cooking facilities. Cooking around a campfire can be a great experience to share. Picnics are a fun and economic way to eat together - even if the weather's bad - have one indoors. Teaching children how to eat cheaply and healthily is very useful for them, rather than assuming they need expensive treats.
  • Entertainment. Trips to beaches, parks and county fairs are ideal summertime activities and most local amateur sports matches can be watched for free. Under cover, many museums and galleries have free entrance while savings can be made at cinemas and theatres by attending matinee performances or finding special offers. Many attractions like swimming pools, restaurant chains etc offer family deals or 'children go free' - have a look at their website, call their head office or visit www.moneysavingexpert.com to see what's available.
  • Holidays. Some charities (such as H.E.L.P. and the Family Holidays Association) provide help and subsidies for family holidays. www.familyholidays.co.uk  is a website designed specifically for families. With money being tight at the moment for many families, and concerns creeping in that the belt might have to be tightened that little bit more, Sunshine.co.uk designed a site that allows families to choose a good holiday at a good price. A range of adventure holidays are offered by www.thekidsandme.co.uk to allow kids and their dads to reconnect with each other. 

To download a pdf document of Contact on a Budget click here

To link to the Client Signposting List click here